Relatability and "Knocked Up"

The last two times I went to the movies, I saw the film Knocked Up. Being a huge fan of the work of the director (Judd Apatow, The 40 Year Old Virgin), the male lead (Seth Rogen, also of The 40 Year Old Virgin), and the impeccable Paul Rudd (Clueless, Wet Hot American Summer, and Anchorman), I had high expectations for this movie. Without divulging too many of my opinions on the jokes contained in the film, or giving away many of the plotlines, I can say that I enjoyed it.

A friend of mine, however, did not care for it too much. In a critique relayed on a message board that we both frequent, this friend (whose anonymity I will maintain unless I hear otherwise) noted:

"Apatow asks way way too much from us. First, we have to believe that Seth Rogen gets into that club, and then he and Katherine Heigl hook up. Once we get past that, we have to believe that there's no abortion, but since that's all personal and shit, we'll let it slide. But here's the really hard part: we're supposed to like Seth Rogen and root for him and believe he can do this. And here's the thing: he's a total fucktard from the opening credits until about one hundred minutes in. We're supposed to believe that no one at any point tells him, "you're going to have to grow up and get a job now, fool." We're supposed to believe that not even his own father tells him this! So we spend the bulk of the movie watching this overgrown child whine and pout and kick and be completely unlikeable in practically every way, and we're supposed to like him and root for him? Can't do it."

I read this critique about a month after my second viewing of Knocked Up, and I thought about it for awhile - it makes some very valid points, definitely. I immediately realized that I would probably never sit down with this friend and convince him, frame-by-frame, of my point of view on this movie (that it's a very funny movie with a great story).

However, it made me think about why I really enjoyed this movie, and ultimately it boiled down to this: I'm kind of a fucktard, too. That's a harsh realization to have, so let me qualify it: Seth Rogen's character is very flawed, and I can very definitively see shades of his character's flaws in my own personality.

To wit: yeah, I probably wouldn't get in that club either. However, I'd like to think that, if I waited on line long enough, I would. Additionally, would I pull a girl as drop-dead gorgeous as Katherine Heigl? Probably not. That being said, there have been a good-solid handful of times where I have hooked up with a girl, and in between kisses, have thought "hey, I'm a little bit out of my league here."

I could go on, I suppose, but it would have the effect of making me simultaneously depressed and wistful about my life. Which I'm not really up for right now. That being said, that leads me to my point: in telling his story in Knocked Up, Apatow does exactly the right thing - he creates a flawed character, but structures the character so that all of the flaws are somehow relatable.

This is not the first time Apatow's turned this trick, either. Look at the aforementioned 40 Year Old Virgin. What made that movie successful? I would argue that he took an odd, somewhat unusual situation - a normal, relatively functional man who happened to be absolutely petrified of sex - and made it relatable.

It's in relatability that movies are made, not in the plausibility of the situation. I think about the character of Toby in the movie American Splendor, as played by Judah Friedlander. In that movie, Toby goes on and on about why Revenge of the Nerds (itself a relatively implausible movie about the human condition, and one which has a major plot point that hinges on a woman's inability to tell the difference between sexual partners due to the impediment of a Darth Vader mask, to boot) is important to him.

Toby drives 260 miles round trip to see this movie, and when questioned about this by Harvey Pekar (as played by Paul Giamatti), he explains why it is important to him:

TOBY: It's a new film called Revenge of the Nerds. It's about a group of nerd college students who are being picked on all the time by the jocks. So they decide to take revenge.
HARVEY: So what you're saying is, you identify with those nerds.
TOBY: Yes. I consider myself a nerd. And this movie has uplifted me. There's this one scene, where a nerd grabs the microphone during a pep rally and announces that he is a nerd and that he is proud of it and stands up for the rights of other nerds.
HARVEY: Right on.

Ultimately, I think that the reason Knocked Up succeeds is that, no matter how implausible the details that Judd Apatow present to the audience, they're never too too far from reality that they never become unrelatable. When it boils down, Seth Rogen's character may not have a tremendous grasp on the reality of his situation, and he might be a schlub, and he might be unworthy of the beauty who winds up in his arms. This is true. But I think we're all there, on some level, at some time. And we watch the movie, and it uplifts us because we see the glimmers of ourselves (the truth in the comedy, if you would).

Right on.